I was on the phone with one of my email subscribers and he told me he likes shorter posts. He doesn’t have the attention span to read a long post and will scan it.
Therefore, I’m combining that feedback with the popular request to talk about how to defeat procrastination and dealing with the inability to concentration. This is fast, short guide on stopping procrastination.
Hyper-Incentivize With A Time-Sensitive Reward
I learned this from the fitness trainer, Matt Kido. Always bored of cardio? Sick of repetitive work? Watch an amazing show (Game of Thrones, Breaking Bad, West World, Dragon Ball Super, Attack on Titan) while running on a treadmill or biking. The kickers?
It has to be a show that is so amazing that you love it and can’t wait until you watch it again.
You can only watch this show while you’re working out.
By doing this, you are chaining a reward that makes you drool with a habit you want to build.
Well, how do you know it’s a good show? Sometimes, you’ll have to test out a few shows or movies. You’ll find it eventually.
It doesn’t have to be a TV show you’re doing this with or exercise. You can apply this to anything. Add an enjoyable activity to what you find un-enjoyable.
Eating out when studying.
Listening to books while dancing.
Playing video games while listening to a video course.
Improving your photography skills while traveling.
Warning: if possible, avoid choosing unproductive rewards like junk food. If you feed one good habit with a bad habit, you’re taking one step forward and one step back.
Simplify to One
Out of all the tasks you can accomplish within a single day what is the most important? It doesn’t have to be urgent — it can be something you’re putting off.
Once you decide what it is, write out the task somewhere big where you can see it. It can be a giant whiteboard or piece of paper. It can also be your computer monitor’s or phone’s screensaver. There’s a browser extension called Momentum that makes it your screen when you open a new tab. The more times it will catch your eye throughout the day, the better.
Your goal should be to finissh that task before anything else. Your measure of success will be whether you finish that task. Completing anything else doesn’t matter.
I learned this concept from Warren Buffett, who often only has around 3 big goals for the entire month on his calendar. The rest of the pages in his calendar are empty.
Warning: don’t make the task too big or intimidating. It’s better to make it smaller and into a manageable chunk. If it’s too overwhelming, you won’t ever get over the intimidation hump to even start.
There you go! Two short, actionable tips that you can test out immediately. Go forth!
Most people think they have to suffer throughout life to achieve success. Asian parents tell us to spend the first 30+ years of our lives pursuing a job we don’t care about to get rich. But is that actually true and is it worth it?
What if the secret to life is actually finding a way to be happy and enjoy life throughout the process.
Find out in my latest podcast episode:
Subscribe to the podcast:
What are your thoughts about eating “dessert and no vegetables”?
Steve Harvey is one of the few who truly started from the bottom.
There are plenty of successful people who started in the middle of life with a good education and rose to the top. Steve flunked out of school, worked at a factory job, go fired, was homeless, and made up his mind to be a success when he was middle-aged.
I can list the names of people I know who started like that on my fingers: Richard Branson, John Paul DeJoria, Chris Gardner, Jim Carrey, Sylvester Stallone, Brian Tracy, and Tony Robbins.
When I first heard Steve’s story on YouTube, it struck me so deeply that I had to learn more. Why? Because some part me had lost hope but I saw that if Steve could change his life so late in the game, maybe I could too.
As always, I do a search to see if he wrote a book on success, not expecting to find anything.
Just like with Michael Strahan, I was surprised to find that he did. It is called Act Like A Success, Think Like A Success. Isn’t that interesting? You’d be amazed how many of your role models have written books explaining their secrets.
It’s a tragedy few people know about these books or bother to read them.
Steve’s book gives me a unique perspective. It’s not advice from someone who at the top. It’s coming from someone who came from the bottom.
By the end of this, any excuse you have, whether it’s “I don’t have the connections”, “I don’t have the skills”, “I don’t have the knowledge”, or “I don’t have the education” should be flushed out of you like turds in a toilet bowl. No excuses.
Many people die letting their false beliefs and excuses hold them back from their dreams. Don’t let this be you. Here are the top 18 lessons I learned from his book:
She’s not anymore, but at one point, she reached that level.
It’s interesting how unaware we are that really well-known female celebrities are billionaires even though they’re in the minority and should be celebrated.
I didn’t know Oprah Winfrey, Martha Stewart, and J.K. Rowling were until I did some research.
I read Martha’s book on success. This book is literally on how you can achieve success. It’s staggering how many successful people have written $10 books on these topics, yet no one is aware of them, let alone read them.
This book was a great read. There was a lot of lessons I really think that many women can relate to and I think it’s one of the best books to read for a women looking to become wealthy, happy, and successful.
Here are the top rules of success I picked up from the book:
If you read all of these, you will not come out the same person you came in (and I mean in a good way).
Here is a list of all the books written by billionaires.
I have looked all over the Internet for a list and I have yet to find a list that even comes close to what I’ve compiled here. The reason is simply because no one seems to be as plugged into the billionaire universe and the books out there as me. Nor have many people set out a goal to read most or any of them.
Richard Branson made a good point in his book that news and internet estimates of net worth are usually wildly off in both directions.
I tried my best to make this list as accurate as possible. I put more weight on the only two net worth sources I trust: Forbes Net Worth Billionaire List and Fortune. If I had any doubt if people were billionaires, I put their books in a separate list in a section at the bottom.
If you know of a book by a billionaire not on this list, leave a comment. I will keep updating this page.
It can seem like most billionaires were born into rich or middle-class families. But can someone really get rich from nothing? Can they really be self-made?
Also, it seems like they all made their money through starting a business in a boring industry. But can you become a billionaire without having to start a business? Can you do it in a non-boring, new industry?
Some of my email subscribers had wrote in requesting advice and honesty on the topic. They were familiar but skeptical of all the ways of making money digitally (affiliate marketing, drop shipping, info products, Shopify, consulting, etc.) and wanted to know which pathway was best for them.
In that article, I broke down how it isn’t nearly as easy as everyone claims it is. If they show off too much or tell you it’s easy, they’re trying to sell you something.
This is especially important since almost every couple months, I discover more and more young so-called “experts” on YouTube, Instagram, blogs, or Facebook showing off their lives and trying to teach you how they did it — even though they’re clearing making their money from teaching you.
I don’t want to discourage you. Making money online is definitely a real thing. And it is possible to make a lot of it in an ethical, sustainable way. Amazon has made billions from it. It’s beautiful because it’s virtual so anyone can get started no matter where they are from.
Near the end of the article, I explained a side hustle called Amazon FBA (also called “Selling on Amazon”) and mentioned that I was going to walk through the whole process with you in the future.
I chose this side hustle because I thought was one of the best because it was simple, low effort, high return, low investment, and something you can start anywhere.
I’ve gotten emails eagerly asking about it since and it’s finally done. I filmed all the steps, from A to Z, on video. But there were some unexpected surprises.
In this free video, you’ll discover:
how to test side hustles to see if it’s something you would be passionate about.
why constant testing like this is so important.
why I don’t think this side hustle is for me even though it may be great for you.
the fun, awesome parts of Amazon FBA.
how I struggled with tons of procrastination and overcame it to get this video done for you.
why strong procrastination is a sign for change.
hidden costs and tasks needed for this side hustle.
the downsides and truth about what it’s like to do Amazon FBA.
“He that is good for making excuses is seldom good for anything else.” -Benjamin Franklin
One common, frustrating theme I have found when talking to people who have mediocre lives is that they’re all excuse-generating machines.
Every time I try to give reasons that their obstacles are solvable and tactics to do so, they come up with a mediocre excuse so that they can remain where they are. I recently had an especially frustrating case of this recently with an Indian man I met who had trouble making friends.
After hearing about my own struggles with this, he came up to me and told me he had similar problems but he was over a decade older than me.
He also had insecurities with his race because most of the people he met were white and he thought he couldn’t relate to them.
But as I dove into the issue, my eagerness to help quickly turned into frustration as I discovered he was immovable as a rock with his beliefs about the world…
A lot of my email subscribers have written in asking about how to make money online. Some of you are trying out affiliate marketing, others are interested in Shopify, and others don’t know where to start but want to do something digital.
This is surprising because I talk mainly about self improvement rather than online business.
Having said that, it may not seem this way since I rarely talk about it but I’m actually quite experienced in this area. I’m an information junkie so I’ve been exposed to almost every big name in the industry of “teaching people to make money online” and have consumed almost all of their free content (even though they have hundreds of podcasts, articles, and videos).
The industry is vast. There are over a hundred gurus out there teaching everything from how to make money from info products, Amazon FBA, eCommerce, Alibaba, online courses, webinars, your own physical products, affiliates, Kindle eBooks, online coaching, sponsorships, and so on. There’s Pat Flynn, John Lee Dumas, Derek Halpern, Chris Ducker, Ryan Lee, Jeff Walker, Ramit Sethi, Navid Moazzez, Frank Kern, Ryan Deiss, Jaime Masters, Amy Porterfield, Kimra Luna, Amy Schmittauer, Tim Schmoyer, Derral Eves, Sue B. Zimmerman, Gary Vaynerchuk, Bryan Harris, Brian Dean, Grant Cardone, Tai Lopez, Marie Forleo, Melanie Duncan, Rick Mulready, Jon Morrow, Jon Loomer, Roberto Blake, Stefan James (who I wrote a guest post for), Steve Chou, and more.
Some focus on a specific part of the process (traffic generation via search engine optimization or social media traffic). Others cover a wider range but add their own personal spin (like a sassy female personality).
Many of you are also suspicious. You don’t know who to trust because you’re scared of getting scammed or you’ve been burned already. Rightfully so.
The internet marketing world has many new and young people emerging onto the scene to sell their scams. Almost every day, I see a new Facebook Ad from someone I’ve never seen bragging about how rich he or she is and how you can do the same with their “Get Rich Quick” product.
How do you find a job or start a business and make a lot of money doing it without making the wrong choice? I spent years trying to find my passion and make it a career. I consumed every video, interview, podcast, and book out there on the topic.
Even now, there isn’t as much good, thorough advice as I want. But there is great advice out there that is just scattered among hundreds of interviews and speeches from successful people. I’ve compiled the best of what I’ve learned, what makes the most sense, and what actually has worked in the real world — not theory. Here’s the guide I wish I had for myself years ago:
Lewis Howes’s latest book, The Mask of Masculinity, is a breath of fresh air.
If you’re not familiar with Lewis, he’s a host of a Top 100 Apple Podcast, The School of Greatness, NY Times best-selling author of a book with the same name, millionaire entrepreneur (he’s in the online marketing industry), and the founder of an annual conference called the Summit of Greatness. He’s basically a self-help influencer.
Honestly, I wasn’t too much of a fan of his previous work because it was mainly generic self-help advice — stuff so many other gurus out there are peddling.
But this is truly a breath of fresh air from his first book because it covers a topic of psychology that many men struggle with that hold them back from success but rarely ever address. Heck, there’s barely any books on the topic.
You can tell this came from a place of honesty.
Lewis wrote it after finding himself unhappy, in toxic fights with his girlfriend, and bloody after a street brawl. Even though he was rich, successful, and a national athlete, there were still internal issues he had to work out.
Here’s what I liked and didn’t like about the book and what you can learn. Watch the video below:
I suggest checking this book out yourself because it will help you:
Have inner peace.
Form strong relationships.
Connect better with others.
Have a healthier self image.
Have a strong self worth.
Improve emotional control.
Have true strength as a man.
Eliminate insecurities with being a man.
Be your true self without fear of judgement or validation.
Each chapter focuses on a different mask that men wear. There are action steps at the end of each chapter to guide you and steps for women to take if they want to help their men.
How This Book Related To Me
This book definitely helped me, but it’s interesting to note that I likely had the opposite experience with some of the masks than Lewis, the jock.
While Lewis was a star athlete growing up and then, rich entrepreneur, he probably felt he could be the best and thought he had to wear the masks of masculinity, invincibility, athleticism, sexuality, alpha, and aggressiveness.
For me, I was so bad at most of these that I thought I could never reach them and just gave up on them. But I still partially believed that those goals were what made an attractive man. As you can tell, that can be a formula for low self esteem, envy, or compensation.
The Material Mask (the mask of wealth and status) was and is the mask I thought I had to compensate for.
I noticed I was fortunate enough to have already come to terms with some of the masks based on being a self help junkie and taking action on what I learned. I am able to be vulnerable when I want to even to strangers, which the Stoic Mask (“a man should never cry or reveal emotions”) tells you that you shouldn’t.
I had also gone through some great personal development through role models like Warren Buffett and met some friendly, muscular people. This helped me develop an internal, though not perfect, sense of self worth that allows me to not feel insecure in places where other man may seem much better than me, such as at a gym as the skinny guy.
Additionally, I had a huge temper, like my parents, as a child. Toxic fights would result in walls or furniture getting destroyed. The chapter on the Assertive Mask is great for working through this. Nowadays, I may overcompensated in the other direction by just being too passive and calm rather than feeling okay with showing people that I’m angry.
Having said that, I’m still not perfect at removing any of these masks and have room for improvement.
My Experiences with the Stoic Mask
I can list the times I cried, came close, or was deeply affected by others crying on my fingers. That’s how few it’s been. And maybe that’s not a good thing.
The Stoic Mask is definitely up at the top of my list for “Masks I can work on removing.” When I was young, my sister started crying to my parents about how I mistreated her. When that wasn’t the case at all, I got the blame and backlash from my father because she was crying.
As a man, I was unwilling to cry, so I held it in and just took the unjust blame. As I ran upstairs, a faint whimper came out.
Later on, my father was wise enough to catch that I was restraining myself from crying. He told me an old Chinese proverb that basically said how women’s tears are a dime a dozen, but a man’s tears are gold. He explained to me that it meant that women can and will cry over everything, even small things. But when a man cries, it means something.
I also remember on one of the final days of middle school, the teachers let all the students say goodbye to each other for the whole afternoon. Almost every kid started crying because they would be going to different high schools — except me and a tall, red headed guy who sarcastically said he wanted to cry but was “physically incapable of it.”
Imagine over a hundred kids, many of which were popular, athletic guys, all crying and hugging each other. People you had never see cry were crying. But it was a fun crying session. The popular girls were crying and hugging everyone. The boys were seen as cool for crying. It wasn’t a painful type of crying.
I didn’t have that many friends, so I was jealous. I spent most of the afternoon just standing and watching from a distance. I kept thinking, “How could they cry about this? I’ve gone through much more horrific stuff that would make you want to cry. These people are weak-minded and probably haven’t experienced as much suffering as me.”
It reminded me a lot of an MTV show I saw a few episodes of where they would go to high schools and make them do emotional exercises, like step to the other side of the room or raise their hand if they experienced some type of trauma.
Half way through the episodes, most of the teens are crying their eyes out.
But a Hispanic teen never did. Even though he raised his hand more than anyone else in the room. He lived in an area infested with drugs and gangs, so you can imagine what he had to go through (death of loved ones, violence, etc.).
When they interviewed him afterwards, he said it was cool that others were crying, but he just didn’t feel like crying.
But perhaps, others weren’t weak-minded or had easier lives than me. Maybe I was uncomfortable with crying.
Maybe I was made to believe that you only cry when you suffer badly. You can’t cry for small relationship-themed moments, like when your classmates go to a different high school, even though you can still keep in touch and meet on the weekends.
Or maybe I was so ashamed of exposing myself to crying or the feeling that I would miss anyone that I held back. Or maybe I just didn’t have many friends to cry for.
The interesting thing about this mask is that I don’t think anyone explicitly told me that as a man, you cannot cry. I think I just picked it up naturally through American society, maybe through the TV shows and movies out there.
I hope you understand that there are safe people and safe places to talk about your struggles and room for you to 10x your life no matter what you’re struggling with now.
“Solitude matters, and for some people, it’s the air they breathe” ― Susan Cain, Quiet: The Power of Introverts in a World That Can’t Stop Talking
There are just as many shy introverts as outgoing extroverts out there. So why does it seem like we’re being left out? Why does it feel like we’re not getting as far ahead? Why do we feel frustrated as if we should speak more or be more like the extroverts?
It’s clear that Western society honors the man who pushes his way to the front. But what about the rest of us? Even people who claim to be “extroverted introverts” can still feel like they weren’t dealt the best hand in life.
In this podcast episode, I’m going to share with you what I learned about succeeding as a shy introvert from:
reading all the top books on introversion including Quiet: The Power of Introversion and Introversion Power
going through scientific studies comparing introverts to extroverts
applying the tips I learned in the books and online in real life to see if it works (hint: it sometimes doesn’t)
sharing strategies I’ve come up with on my own when theories consistently didn’t work in the real world
You’ll also learn why so many Asian Americans are introverts (spoilers: it’s a mix of culture, upbringing, and who they grow up with).
Question of the day: What’s the #1 action step you learned from the podcast that you will apply to your own life immediately? Leave a comment and let me know.